i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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