So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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