I want to stick my p in your. b.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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