So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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