you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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