she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
