Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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