are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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