What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Randomize
