I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
