oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
My ass is underappreciated
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
