There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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