I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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