Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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