the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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