The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
