he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
You may now shotgun with the bride
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
