It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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