I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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