A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
