It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize
