haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
