the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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