I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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