Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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