in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
