The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize