She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
