Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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