So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Need sex. Gaining weight.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize