How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
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