Its about making memories worth repressing
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
