After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Randomize
