Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
