Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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