So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
