she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
