she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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