Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
