Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
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