my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED