you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn