chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
