At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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