ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
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