he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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