I'm drive I can fine osifer
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
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