She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Randomize
