I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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