i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize