theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
