Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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